The Shocking Truth About Why You Can't Stop Spending (It's Not What You Think)

Discover the surprising truth about why you spend money when you don't want to. This eye-opening video reveals the neuroscience behind emotional spending and shopping habits, explaining why willpower isn't the answer to controlling your finances. 

Understanding your spending triggers isn't about lack of discipline - it's about recognizing your brain's misguided attempts at self-care. 

Whether you're dealing with impulse buying, emotional spending, or struggling to save money, this video provides crucial insights into your money mindset. You'll learn about behavioral and thought-based habits, how neural pathways influence your spending decisions, and why your brain associates shopping with emotional relief.

Perfect for anyone looking to understand their spending habits, break the cycle of emotional shopping, and develop a healthier relationship with money. No shame, no judgment - just understanding and practical insights for real change.

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Transcript

 Okay. Have you ever found yourself just scrolling on your phone? Clicking? Bye bye bye after a hard day, even though you promised yourself you wouldn't spend any more money,  don't worry friend. You are not alone.  Today we're going to understand why we spend money when we really don't want to. Let's get something out of the way. Right off the bat, your spending habit isn't because you're weak or you lack discipline. It's actually your brain's misguided attempt to take care of yourself. Think of it as your mind trying to give you a big hug. You had a rough day and your brain is just telling you, I want you to feel better and you'll feel better once you buy that new purse. So picture this. You have had a Monday from hell. Your boss criticized your work, you spilled coffee on your favorite shirt and your car made that weird sound again, and you're scrolling  through your phone and boom, there's that pair of shoes that you have been wanting for a year. Your brain immediately says, Hey, remember how good it felt last time we bought something?

Nice. Let's do that thing again it's like having a well-meaning, but yet clueless friend who thinks the solution to everything is shopping, bad breakup. Let's get a new outfit. Rough day at work. Those iPods are on sale, the problem is that through repetition, we have created a habit, and that's actually the definition of a habit, A repetitive thought or behavior, in this case with money and with money, we're actually dealing with two types of habits. There's the behavioral habit and then there's the thought based habit. the behavioral habit is the actual act of, let's say, overspending, impulse buying, not saving the thought based habit. Are those thoughts, beliefs, and fears about money that are driving those behaviors? Vicky, because remember, as I always say. Thoughts, beliefs make us feel a certain way. And it's that feeling that creates our action.

And it's those actions that make up our life, our outcome, our results. It's all because of neuroscience. So have you ever heard that phrase, neurons that fire together, wire together? 

Let me explain it a little better with something we all know. Learning to drive. Remember that first time behind the wheel, everything was really intense. You were concentrating really hard. You're checking the mirrors, you're putting your foot on the brake. You're shifting gears. I guess that's not a thing we do anymore.

You're checking the mirrors again and easing the break and doing all these things in a very intense way. It was overwhelming. Your brain was working overtime just to remember each and every single step,  but fast forward now  you hop in your car and everything just flows automatically. You drive home while you're thinking about dinner plans or listening to a podcast.

 Have you ever parked gone into the grocery store and come out and not remember driving there or where your car might be? The reason why now driving is almost unconscious to you is because those neurons have built a super highway of connections.

Your brain doesn't need to think through every step  anymore. It's all wired together, 

The exact same process happens with our spending habits. The first time you buy something, after feeling stressed, it's like those first nervous moments behind the wheel. By the fifth time, you're getting more comfortable with the route.

The 20th time, you barely need to think about it, and the time, it's just automatic. Your daily commute, they're back. 

I have a friend, a client, who every time she got into an argument with her boyfriend, she'd end up buying a new dress. At first, it was the conscious choice to kind of cheer herself up, but after six months, she find herself browsing clothes before she even realized she was feeling upset. She was on autopilot. I had a friend Mary, who was really into tech gadgets, and she got into the habit of treating herself with a new tech gadget whenever she hit a work deadline. It started small with like Bluetooth speakers, and it ended up with a drawer full of tech gadgets that she didn't even use. Here's the exciting part. Just like you can learn new routes to work, you can build new pathways in your brain. Maybe instead of shopping when you're stressed, you phone a friend that makes you laugh. You hit the gym, you go out for a run. You can just change up the behavior and rewire your brain.

Think of these neuropathways as like a river. 

Think of that water as your stress. It's flowing. It needs to go somewhere. And right now it is flowing straight to shopping town. But we can create new channels to lead to wherever you want. Whatever  destination you want. And like I said before, you are not alone. Statistics show that 35% of women admit to overspending when they're stressed.

So this is just something that many of us do at an attempt to make ourselves feel better. So we shouldn't beat ourselves up. It's our brain actually trying to make us feel better and get back to a place of wellbeing. Think of these desires to spend like urges. These urges are like this persistent salesperson in your head. Every time you give in, you're telling that salesperson, Hey, great job. Keep pushing. Your brain actually thinks this must be important. Let's make this connection stronger. That's why this retail therapy is buying things you don't need, with money you don't have.

And it's not just the clever little saying, it's a wake up call when you are scrolling mindlessly through online stores at midnight, you're not really shopping for products. You're shopping for emotions. You're shopping for a certain way that you wanna feel. Maybe it's peace of mind. Maybe it's temporary happiness, maybe it's a sense of control, and maybe it's escape from stress or any other feeling.

The way to change this in your life is to realize that your spending habit isn't self-sabotaged. It's actually, again, just a misguided attempt at you making you try to feel better. Your brain is just trying to help you. It's just chosen the wrong tool for the job.  Now that you understand this and you understand why your brain is pushing so hard, why that voice gets so loud and that urge to spend comes, you're probably wondering, okay, but how do I stop it?

That's exactly what we'll cover in the next video. How to break these habits without relying on willpower 'cause that will not help you. If you are overspending or you're not, you're spending when you don't want to or you're not saving and you want to, you are not broken, you are not weak, and you are not alone. You are just. Human, like all of us with a brain that's trying. Its very best to make you feel better.

So friends, please share this video if you know anyone who is struggling with their spending. And if you want to shine a light on your current money mindset, go to her money coach.com/quiz and get the free money mindset assessment. And remember, you have the power to change your , and I'm here cheering you on every step of the way.